Mark Gilroy

Bringing Books to Life!

What Goes Into Self-Publishing? Should You Consider It?

When self-publishing is done right, every one of the tasks that go into traditional publishing still have to be done. (Note I used the phrase done right.) There has to be a unique and compelling idea; great writing and editorial; author promotion; a good looking cover that fits the tone and genre of the book; the right price point; and places to sell the book. It’s wonderful to land a deal with a publishing company for your book project.

But that is no longer your only – and oftentimes best – option.  Self-publishing – or the term I had hoped would take off, micropublishing – opens the door for you to present your great idea to the world in the book form.

But that doesn’t mean it’s easy. There are still a lot of dynamics for you to consider.

Random Thoughts On Getting Older (or “happy birthday to me”)

The joys of getting older.

Turning 50 – what changes?

In case I didn’t remember that tomorrow is my birthday, Facebook came up with an app that makes sure I and a host of well-wishers – along with a few trash talkers – are very aware that I am about to have another number added to my age. Last year was the big five-oh so this one shouldn’t be that big of a deal. Right? But then again, it is a full year later, so maybe this and each subsequent birthday is a much greater accomplishment and deserving of more fanfare.

I started thinking about writing this blog on getting older last week and came up with a really clever title and approach to the topic, but since I didn’t write anything down I can’t remember what I had in mind. So while I’m thinking about it now, here are a few random thoughts on the aging process that just might reflect what is coming your way a good ways down the road, what you’re currently experiencing as a fellow 50-something or what things you remember (but might have forgotten) that are now in your rear view mirror.

1. Oatmeal and prescription meds are big topics of discussion. And I’m not talking idle chatter. I’m talking the fodder of deep and enthralling conversations.

2. I now routinely call each of my children by one of their sibling’s name. Despite rolled eyes or vacant stare, I don’t think they mind that much and maybe find it mildly amusing. At least until I refer to one of the boys by one of the girl’s names or vice versa.

3. Retirement is on my mind. It was a couple years ago, too. But back then I was thinking I might do it some day. After watching my accounts and home equity go the wrong direction, I now think more about not retiring some day.

4. Stretchy fabrics are underrated. Particularly fabric swatches that circle the waist.

5. The kids think Amy and I talk too loud. I think they’re crazy. I can barely hear a word Amy is saying.

6. They – whoever ‘they’ are – are right; ‘old’ is a relative term. Even if a few things hurt that I didn’t know existed in my 30’s, I really don’t feel old at almost-51. More to the point, in my copious research for this piece, I discovered ‘old’ refers to people who are five or more years advanced in age than I am. Not only that, ‘old’ is on a sliding scale and will continue to be five years out from where I am in future years.

7. Fiber is mysterious and confusing. When I think of fiber, I think of something substantial and solid. Now they (there ‘they’ are again) sell fiber – with extra roughage thrown in for good measure – in little gel caps. I don’t know what this has to do with anything but I could go on about fiber all day!

8. Many parents of young children look like children themselves. This observation isn’t actually new. It came to me 10 years ago when I took my oldest child to college and my youngest child to kindergarten. The same week.

9. The world really does need the wisdom that comes from age and experience. This wisdom is treasure to be cherished and honored. I don’t know how I ever thought that youth and energy were what made big things happen.

10. A lot of my friends in my age range are looking older these days. (This observation is only intended for certain trash talkers – and you know who you are.)

Aging. It’s no laughing matter. It’s something we all must face. And on the positive side, it certainly beats the alternative unless, of course, you are one of the drafters of Obama’s health care plan. So I’m going to get very serious now.

But first I think I’ll take an afternoon nap!

Man’s Best Friend: When Is It Time to Say Goodbye to a Family Pet?

To his dog, every man is King;
hence the constant popularity of dogs.
Aldous Huxley

When is it time to say goodbye – or more accurately, euthanize a beloved family pet? Just asking that question makes me feel … squeamish, uncomfortable, disloyal, and more than a little guilty.

I’ve been surfing the net to find perspectives and advice on knowing the right moment. This is probably my roundabout way of starting to get comfortable with something that needs to happen in the not so distant future, even if it’s not this week or month or calendar year.

One of my problems is that about the time it seems very obvious that my 12-year-old miniature schnauzer, Colby, has no ‘quality of life’ and is so miserable that putting him down is simple kindness, he perks up and shows a flash of his youthful vigor. Even if just for a day or two.

I’m sure that some of the guilt I feel comes from the way we anthropomorphize our pets. I know in my mind he’s not really a human, but he’s been part of the family so long – and paws down, he listens to me more than anyone else in the house – that it feels like I’m contemplating the life and death of a person.

Another stream of guilt feelings for me probably has to do with the realization that I’m not just looking at his quality of life but my own. The extra care and expense of an older pet, one who gets a couple shots a day and needs to be looked after and helped in other ways is probably one thing I simply don’t want on top of the responsibilities of family life. Doing something that is in Colby’s best interest that just happens to be in my best interest is not necessarily a matter of rationalization and those two dynamics are not mutually exclusive – but you try telling yourself that when your internal dialog includes phrases like ‘lethal injection’.

The most common advice I’ve bumped into on the net – from the ‘ask the vet’ to the ‘my pet tribute’ sites, and on over to Old Yeller movie forums – has to do with the matter of pain. I know Colby is at minimum very uncomfortable. But how much pain is he in? He definitely favors one hip and he struggles to breathe sometimes. He’s very lethargic – but so are a lot of other dogs and even a few humans I know; doesn’t mean we put them down for wanting to lay around. Then other times he seems to really enjoy his walk and looks content to just be here.

Should I just call the vet and ask him or her what to do? The non ‘ask the vet’ sites warn you that many vets will just listen for a little while and then tell you what they think you want to hear. I’ve had worse conversations than that!

One bit of counsel that showed up numerous times is to not fall in the trap of ‘waiting for God to decide the time’ – that as a pet owner you have the responsibility to make a hard decision if the pet is miserable. This is just another variation of not letting Colby wallow helplessly in pain, and as I’ve noted previously, I’m no expert on observing what is ‘too much pain’ and ‘miserable’. I did have a friend on Facebook this morning tell me that dogs hide pain because they are people pleasers. I don’t doubt that but I’m still not convinced anyone can really ‘know’ that. And she got that from her vet who might be a bit of a people pleaser himself.

Well. I filled his bowl with food. I gave Colby his morning shot. Still not sure what I’m going to do. But at least now I know it isn’t today.